Sabtu, Januari 29, 2011

25 Cara Menangi Hati Manusia

Untuk kali keduanya aku membelek buku ‘25 Ways to win with people’ oleh John C Maxwell & Les Parrot, sebuah buku milik ayah yang sudah berusia 5tahun sejak aku tingkatan empat.

25 CARA MEMENANGI HATI MANUSIA- JOHN C MAXWELL & LES PARROT

Aku memang liat membaca buku Bahasa Inggeris (sebab aku perlu pegang dua buku pada satu masa, satu buku bacaan, satu buku rujukan iaitu kamus), tapi, ayah kata buku Bahasa Inggeris lebih accurate berbanding buku terjemahannya. Selalunya apabila ayah beli buku motivasi untuk dirinya, buku tersebut secara automatik akan diturunkan kepadaku, tapi, jarang2 sekali aku akan menghabiskan pembacaan melainkan beberapa buku seperti ‘25 Ways to Win with People’, dan ‘The Power of Your Subconcious Mind’ yang betul2 memenangi hatiku untuk membacanya. Mungkin aku boleh kongsi sedikit isi kandungan 25 Ways to Win with People. (kalau rajin, aku akan translate, kalau m***s, aku akan copy paste.;p)

Nota : Di sini, aku akan kongsikan hanya 5cara memenangi hati manusia menurut John Maxwell. Sangat panjang kalau mahu bagi 25 sekaligus. ;p

WAY 1 : START WITH YOURSELF

‘Start with yourself!’ Kalau kita ingin memenangi hati manusia, harus memenangi diri sendiri terlebih dahulu. Menurut penulis, ‘ If we do not form a winning character, we are sure to lose with other people.’

‘Swallow knowledge of ourselves.’ Bagaimana ingin mengenali diri sendiri? Pertama, ‘recognize your value’, kemudian, ‘accept your value’, ‘increase you value’ dan ‘believe in your value.’ Aku ringkaskan di sini. Tapi, maafkanku kerana tidak mampu mem’bahasa melayu’kan tulisan Maxwell dan Les sebiji2. Sikit2 saja ya. ;p (tanda2 sedikit rajin menterjemah)

Ask : How can I increase my value in order to benefit others, rather than just myself?

Do : List the things you can improve about yourself, along with specific steps to take to make the improvements.

WAY 2 : PRACTICE 30-SECOND RULE

‘He who waits to do great deal of good at once will never do anything.’ Samuel Johnson.

When most people meet others, they search for ways to make themselves look good. The key of 30-second Rule is reversing this practice. When you make contact with people, instead of focusing on yourself, search for ways to make them look good. Think of what to do to other people to make them feel good, think of some words that can encourage them. Remember that all people feel better and do better when you give them attention, affirmation and appreciation. The next time you make contact with people, begin by giving them your undivided attention during the first thirty second. Affirm them and show your appreciation some way.

According to psychologist Henry H Goddard, when tired children were given a word of praise or commendation, the ergograph (instrument for energy level experiment), showed an immediate upward surge but when the children were criticized or discouraged, the ergograph showed that their physical energy took a sudden nosedive. See, how words have great power!

Everybody needs motivation from time to time. Using the 30-second rule helps encourage people to be and do their best. Never underestimate the power of motivation :

Motivation helps people who know what they should do… to do it!

Motivation helps people who know what commitment they should make… to make it!

Motivation helps people who know what habit they should break… to break it!

Motivation helps people who know what path they should take… to take it!

Motivation makes it possible to accomplish what you should accomplish.

Ask : What positive, encouraging thing can I asy to each person I will see today?

Do : Give everyone you meet the triple-A treatment (attention, affirmation, and appreciation)

WAY 3 : LET PEOPLE KNOW YOU NEED THEM

‘The greatest compliment that was ever paid me was when someone asked me what I thought, and attended to my answer.’ – Henry David Thoreau

‘Good leaders make people feel that they’re at the very heart of things, not at the periphery.’ – Warren Benns

According to John Maxwell, secret to getting people to join a team is, ‘I can’t do anything without you!’ From this sentence, leaders can become great only when they realize they the only one who need people. If you achieve something great, it would be the result of turning the dream from me to we!

John said, ‘ I also realized that any dream I could achieve without the help of other people was too small.’ And John handed a card which written ‘I have a Dream’ to Les Parrot. He read :

My dream allows me to…

Give up at any moment all that I am in order to receive all that I can become.

Sense the invisible so I can do impossible.

Trust God’s resources since the dream is bigger that all my abilities and acquaintances.

Continue when discouraged, for where there is no faith in the future, there is no power in the present.

Attract winners, because big dreams draw big people.

See my people and myself in the future. Our dream is the promise of what we shall be one day.

Yes, I have a dream. It is greater than any of my gifts. It is as large as the world, but it begins with one. Won’t you join me? – John Maxwell

Asking people for help is a great way to make them feel like million bucks. Why? Because :

People need to be needed

People need to know they need people

People need to know they are needed

People need to know that they helped

Ask : Who specifically can help me do better job than I can do alone? Who is just waiting to be asked to join in what I am doing?

Do : Sincerely ask others for input or help and attend carefully to what they have to say.

WAY 4 : CREATE A MEMORY AND VISIT IT OFTEN

‘Memory is the treasury and guardian of all things.’ - Cicero

Few things bond people together like a shared memory. Soldiers who battle together, teammates who win a championship, and work teams that hit their goals share a connection that never goes away.

Some memories come as the result of circumstances, but, many can be proactively created. But, how to create memories?

Iniative- make something happen

Memories don’t find us- we find them!

Time- Set aside time to make something happen

Take time to be with people you want to create memory with.

Planning- Plan for something to happen

Most people don’t lead their lives – they accept their lives.

Creativity- Find a way to make something happen

When something so dull, be creative, get something else to create memories!

Shared Experiences- Make something happen together

Share hobbies to create memories.

Mementos- Show that something happened

We all have things we love – not because they have any material value but because they remind us of places we’ve been or things we’ve done. When you help someone else create a memory, give that person something to remember it by.

Relive the Memory- Talk about what happened

It’s the payoff! Write a note or often have a chat about memories. It creates a connection that bonds together and both will feel great.

Ask : What memories have I already created with people in my life that we need to relive together?

Do : Plan an experience that will commemorate an achievement or milestone that people will talk about years from now. And don’t forget to create memento of it.

WAY 5 : COMPLIMENT PEOPLE IN FRONT OF OTHER PEOPLE

‘Admonish thy friend in secret, praise them openly.’ – Publilius Syrus

It is essential that you learn to give your compliments in front of others as well as one-on-one. Why? Because that private compliment turned public, instantly and dramatically increases in value. Why that’s so important? Because…

People want to feel worthwhile in life

Compliments increase in value when we value the person who gives them

Compliments affirm people and make them strong

Compliments in front of others are the most effective ones you can give

Ask : Who can I spotlight in front of others?

Do : Compliment someone around you in front of other people today.

Note : be ikhlas ok. ;p

***

Alhamdulillah, cukup 5. =) Akhirnya penulisan ini dalam bahasa inggeris juga. (tanda m***s translate) Sedikit ringkasan buku daripadaku. Selebihnya, bolehlah cuba baca bukunya ya. =) Tapi, insyaAllah, aku akan senaraikan semua 25 cara tanpa penjelasan. We almost there, keep on running! =)

WAY 6 : GIVE OTHERS A REPUTATION TO UPHOLD

‘Treat a man as he appears to be and you make him worse. But treat a man as if he already were what he potentially could be, and you make him what he should be.’ – Goethe

WAY 7 : SAY THE RIGHT WORDS AT THE RIGHT TIME

‘No man has a prosperity so high or firm, but that two or three words can dishearten it; and there is no calamity which right words will not begin to redress.’ – Ralph Waldo Emerson

WAY 8 : ENCOURAGE THE DREAMS OF OTHERS

‘Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.’ – Mark Twain

WAY 9 : PASS THE CREDIT ON THE OTHERS

‘If each of us were to confess his most secret desire, the one that inspires all his plans, all his actions, he would say : ‘I want to be praise.’’- E.M. Cioran

WAY 10 : OFFER YOUR VERY BEST

‘I do the very best I know how- the very best I can; and I mean to keep on doing so until the end.’ – Abraham Lincoln

WAY 11 : SHARE A SECRET WITH SOMEONE

‘Conceal not your secret from your friend, or you deserve to lose him.’ – Portuguese proverb

WAY 12 : MINE THE GOLD OF GOOD INTENTIONS

‘ To err is human; to forgive is not company policy.’

‘Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a permanent attitude.’ – Martin Luther King Jr

WAY 13 : KEEP YOUR EYES OFF THE MIRROR

‘I don’t know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who have sought and found how to serve.’ – Albert Schweitzer

WAY 14 : DO FOR OTHERS WHAT THEY CAN’T DO FOR THEMSELVES

‘You have not lived today until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.’ – John Bunyan

WAY 15 : LISTEN WITH YOUR HEART

‘The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn’t being said.’ – Peter Drucker

WAY 16 : FIND THE KEYS TO THEIR HEARTS

‘Coaches who can outline plays on a blackboard are a dime a dozen. The ones who succeed are those who get inside their players and motivate them.’ – Vince Lombardi

WAY 17 : BE THE FIRST TO HELP

‘You can get everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want.’ – Zig Ziglar

WAY 18: ADD VALUE TO PEOPLE

‘You can’t make the other fellow feel important in your presence if you secretly feel that he is nobody.’ – Les Giblin

WAY 19 : REMEMBER A PERSON’S STORY

‘ Many a man would rather you heard his story than granted his request.’ – Philip Stanhope

WAY 20 : TELL A GOOD STORY

‘The story we tell the best are the ones we’ve lived.’

WAY 21 : GIVE WITH NO STRINGS ATTACHED

‘Life’s most persistent and urgent question is : What are you doing for others?’ – Martin Luther King JR

WAY 22 : LEARN YOUR MAILMAN’S NAME

‘Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.’ – Dale Carnegie

WAY 23 : POINT OUT PEOPLE’S STRENGHT

‘ The praises of others may be of use in teaching us, not what we are, but what we ought to be.’ – August W. Hare

WAY 24 : WRITE NOTE OF ENCOURAGEMENT

‘The power of words is immerse. A well-chosen word has often sufficed to stop a flying army, to change defeat into victory, and to save an empire.’ – Emile De Girardin

WAY 25 : HELP PEOPLE WIN

‘ The most important measure of how good a game I played was how much better I’d make my teammates play.’ – Bill Russell

***

Sampai sini. Selamat Menjadi Pemenang! ;p

Wallahu’alam.

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